I am standing in line at McDonalds contemplating the consumption of a big mac, fries, and a diet (of course) coke. Suddenly, a sexy man cuts into line in front of me, turns around, and, well, let's just say that, as usual, I wake up before it gets really good.
What sticks with me is not just the vivid nature of the dream but the utter disappointment which occurred when a cat's cold nose entered my ear and woke me up. Most of the frustration was not that the man part of the dream was interrupted, though it was certainly vivid and ended prematurely. Instead, I was distressed about waking up before I got to eat that food.
You see, it's been over a year since I've eaten a big mac. Since starting Weight Watchers 18 months ago, I've only been to McDonalds once and that was because I was stranded at an airport for several hours and had a voucher to use.
I know that McDonalds is not on anyone's list of fine foods. Even among fast food and burgers, it doesn't measure up to finer chains like Fat Burger and Five Guys and Smash Burger. Colorado may soon have In-N-Out Burger, but big macs are here now. You can find McDonalds virtually everywhere, and the quality is consistent - you know what you are getting every time.
When I used to eat approximately one big mac every ten days, I'd remove the pickles and the excess lettuce and squeeze on a single packet of ketchup. I'd hold all the layers in place as I took that first bite. Exquisite.
Big macs are probably the single worst thing you can eat. Well, it's probably worse to eat a whole pizza at a single sitting, which I also used to do, but I'll save that for another essay. Besides, I don't dream about pizza. I dream about those two all-beef patties, special sauce, and all that other stuff.
Occasionally, I consider splurging on a mac, but I'm kind of proud of my months of denial. Plus, if I have to blow that many Weight Watcher points, I'd rather really go all out on something spectacular like, well, a Fat Burger.
I'm sorry, were you hoping for more about the other part of the dream?
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